The Transition Into A “Kits” Girl

As each day passes, I become increasingly aware of how much you become of your surroundings. I’ve undergone quite the metamorphosis since I was a modest kid from Chilliwack, which is located in the heart of the Fraser Valley. It was quite the culture shock coming to Kitsilano from my humble beginnings of country town life, 4-H clubs and dairy farms. I’ve slowly adapted to the requisite Kitsilano lifestyle over the last few years of living here. There was once resistance to conformity in my life, but I’ve caved since and become every bit the typical Lululemon wearing, yoga practicing, Jericho Beach jogging, Starbucks drinking, vegetarian, sustainability and green peace activist, Kitsilano girl.

Since my move to the Kitsilano area, David Bach’s ‘Latte Factor’ and ‘Starbucksalization’ have indeed taken over my life. There was time when I didn’t even know how to pronounce the word, ‘latte’, let alone give the scroll of directions I do when ordering the damn thing: ‘yah, make that a double shot with soy milk, extra hot, and give me some vanilla syrup, thanks!’ And then, there’s the occasional bubble tea. Not drinking the occasional bubble tea and not pretending you enjoy the gooey texture of those tapioca balls would be just too chav for Kitsilano. One day I actually calculated how much my caffeine infused lifestyle is going to cost me over a time period of 20 years. Disclaimer: Continue reading only if you can stomach graphic detail. Consider yourself warned. Calculate it. Spending $5.00 a day on a latte or bubble tea, for the next 20 years, will cost you, I kid you not, $36,500!!! You now have been cursed with the knowledge that you have no excuse to adopt a child from Rwanda or to donate a generous amount of coin to your favourite charity.

You cannot live in Kits without even thinking once to yourself, ‘will my butt look that good in those Lulu pants?’ The Lulu gear is irresistible. To tell you the truth, my wardrobe has slowly transgressed and is being taken over by Lululemon. I am not just talking about those notorious pants and jackets, but I’ve taken the Lulu obsession right down to owning headbands and sportsbras. I now practice Bikram’s yoga as a new pass time- after all, how can you be living in Kits and wearing your Lulus, if you don’t ever consider re-energizing your body by joining your mind, body, and spirit into the unified force of ‘Oneness’? ‘Toxins’, i.e. meat, have been eliminated from my diet and dining at the fine vegetarian eatery ‘The Naam’ and studying at the 24hr Calhoun’s are also additions to my repertoire. I even own my own sushi making set now! Thank Goddess I’m already Indian, because apparently our food is all the new rage -not yet another thing to take up in this new wave, multi-culture embracing lifestyle…coconut cream curries, mango butter chicken, naan bread and chai (yes, apparently it’s ‘chai’ and not ‘cha’ you chav Poonjabs!!!), oh my! Not to mention, using Indian words like ‘kismet’, ‘atmah’, and ‘karma’ to help obtain the spiritual, bodiless, immaterial way of life. Although I do realize that it’s a large misconception to believe that the only type of sustainable agriculture that exists is ‘organic’ polyculture, I am also starting to see myself give into this misconception by incorporating more and more organics into my produce shopping. Alas, although not adopted as of yet, shopping at Caper’s is only a few steps away in my ever-continuing metamorphosis.

Weather permitting, I also find myself going for regular jogs or roller blading ventures around Jericho Beach. Sometimes I’ll be inspired by the vast ocean and find myself barefoot and chanting a typical Lululemon mantra, ‘live in the moment and breathe deeply, because that is the meaning of life,’ while doing some yoga on the rocks of the beach. I am virtually transforming into the Kitsilano Barbie doll…an Indian Barbie doll? Now that’s a concept. Maybe it would come with multiple bindis, sarees, and a snake charming Ken, (Indian Barbie’s Taj Mahal and Rickshaw sold separately).

Having undergone the transformation to become my new, multi-faith accepting, and diversified self, I’ve realized that I haven’t been paying homage to the town that gave so much to me growing up. Will Chilliwack take me back? I’m afraid it may not. Goddess help me because, once you go Kits, you’ll never go back.